Random Whinge

I was watching Eat, Pray, Love on the tv when i suddenly remembered my last relationship. When Liz thought about his marriage, she realized that she disappeared into the person she married. Like when they bought their house, she claimed that she took part of furnishing it, but she couldn’t see herself in that house. Then when she talked to her husband about her work and their plan to go to Aruba, he just changed subject and talked about his plan to change career, look for another job, take his degree, etc, without giving any slight attention to her subject. Wow that’s just exactly what i felt, it was all about him, his dreams, his plans, his life! At the end he took my life and i became him in a girl version. I questioned myself, why would i still wanna do that? Why would i still be down on my knee begging him to come back? Why would i embarass myself to my lowest level by loving him still?

Maybe i should go somewhere try to find my world too. Italy sounds good, i’m planning to have Euro Trip anyway and Rome and Venice are defo in my list. India, hmm i don’t really need to find God, i already have my God. Indonesia, well i went to Bali straight after he dumped me and I’ve been there too often lol. Had one or two rebound guys there too, one of them has accent sounded exactly like Felipe (sstt). So do i really need to travel around the world just to find myself or simply just to get him outta my heart? God knows how much i want him to get outta my head.

So here i am, eating a big chunk of chocolate bar while watching Eat, Pray, Love and whinging on my blog on Saturday night. Finally after a couple of month seeking shelter in some random rebound guys, accepting everyone i met all way along as a teacher, being brave enough to leave everything that comfort me, i take my destiny to be on my own. Put me a “Single Girl Badges of Honour” on cos i’m a real single now!


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